The CRSMUTDC2 Match Drawing

 Okay boys and girls, the time is here. Vice, Deewun and I are in the process of setting up for the big CRIHAOCSMUTDC2: EB Match Drawing Chattacular. What we’re going to do is we’ll all three be chatting together as Vice draws the matches from Optimash Prime and i’ll post the drawings, the person who picked it, and our reactions to them, so you can find out just how much we hate you all for torturing us.

Before that occurs though (because we’re still waiting on Deewun) I have a big Cewsh Reviews related announcement to make.

After discussing it with Rajah himself, starting at Wrestlemania, you will now be able to read Cewsh Reviews on the main page of Rajah.com.

There wont be any pictures, naturally, so it wont be as totally batshit awesome as the reviews you know and love, but you’ll still be getting them here on the blog as well. Just many MORE of you will be getting them now, and with any luck more eyes will be headed our way in the near future.

But that’s for then and this is for now.  So without any further ado, here are the matches submitted by you!

The first match drawn is….

KEN OHKA vs. TSUYOSHI in a BREAD EATING DEATHMATCH
Submitted by Ringo!


Viceroy says: 
Ok, so, the first match is…
Deewun says:
*drumroll*
Viceroy says:
TSUYOSHI KIKUCHI vs. KEN OHKA
In a bread eating death match.
Cewsh says:
YUS
Viceroy says:

Deewun says:
AWESOME
Cewsh says:
BREAD EATING DEATH MATCH
Deewun says:
I was REALLY hoping that one would go through
Cewsh says:
DDT is going to be so happy.
Deewun says:
That’s Ringo’s
Viceroy says:
Right off the bat, we’re treated to something absolutely insane and by far the most absurd thing we could possibly get out of this. Coming from Ringo, I’m not surprised by this.
Cewsh says:
Oh shit, you’re right.
SORRY DDT

The second match drawn is….

AJ STYLES vs. SAMOA JOE from Turning Point 2005. Submitted by GENERAL WRESTLING!


Deewun says:
*drumroll again*
Viceroy says:
Ahahaha Matthew will love this.
Submitted by GENERAL WRESTLING…
AJ STYLES vs. SAMOA JOE from Turning Point 2005.
Cewsh says:
Ahahahahahahahaha
GENERAL WRESTLING
Viceroy says:
I can hear a blood vessel popping in Buffalo.
Deewun says:
Huh, I didn’t get that one on my list
I don’t have it downloaded yet, but I’m sure I can find it
Cewsh says:
Yeah should be easy.
Fucking amazing match as I recall.
Will definitely make up for the first one.

The third match drawn is.. 

AKEBONO vs. THE BIG SHOW – WRESTLEMANIA 21


Submitted by takerson!

Viceroy says:
The tides of work rate have turned 180 degrees, giving us…
AKEBONO vs. BIG SHOW
Why takerson!? WHYYYY?
Cewsh says:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Deewun says:
Ugh, I’m glad there are ten matches
and I thought that was Cewshy’s
Cewsh says:
Nah, I didn’t submit one. Did I mislabel it?
Deewun says:
yup, but that’s cool
Cewsh says:
Man, I suck at this.
Viceroy says:
Seconded.
Deewun says:
so that is Takerson’s submission
Cewsh says:
But seriously, 1,000 pounds of man ass. THANKS TAKEY.
Deewun says:
cool, better than the Gimmick Battle Royal, that’s for certain
Cewsh says:
But yes, takey was guaranteed a submission due to his awesome Cewsh Revierws sign at Against All Odds.
Deewun says:
though I was REALLY hoping for his Dennis Rodman v. Mr. Perfect match
Cewsh says:
I HOPE HE’S HAPPY.
That would have been brilliant.   The fourth match drawn is…


HULK HOGAN vs. THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR – WCW HALLOWEEN HAVOK 97

Submitted by Matt Seaton!

Viceroy says:
Submitted by Matt Seaton (who?)..
Deewun says:
One of my viewers
Viceroy says:
HULK HOGAN vs. THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR
….WCW style.
Deewun says:
AMAZING
the rematch of ALL rematches
Cewsh says:
Oh my god.
I mean, what can you even say?
Deewun says:
This card is taking a turn for the shit
Viceroy says:
RRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGHGHHAHHHRREOFLLURRRR?
Cewsh says:
I’m starting to think that our fans took the facepalm review more personally than I thought.
Deewun says:
hahahaha
Viceroy says:
We don’t have fans.
We have friends.
[/Wanderlei Silva]
Deewun says:
I don’t have fans
I have people who watch my stuff occassional and give me loads of shit    The fifth match drawn is…


Penalty Box match: Team Canada (Lance Storm, Mike Awesome and Elix Skipper) (with Major Gunns) v. The Filthy Animals (Konnan, Rey Misterio, Jr. and Billy Kidman) (with Tygress) w/ special enforcer Hacksaw Jim Duggan from WCW Sin 2001

Submitted by The Powers That Be!

 
Viceroy says:
….FIFTH MATCH
Deewun says:
*crosses fingers*
Cewsh says:
Oh please something good.
Viceroy says:
C’mon, you didn’t put my “Because your opinions are crap. Kapow.” comment in?
Anyway..
Cewsh says:
Ahahaha had already posted it.
Deewun says:
That’s all right, it’ll be forever remembered now
Viceroy says:
Next up we have a PENALTY BOX MATCH.
Cewsh says:
A what now?
Deewun says:
Oh FUCK YES!
Viceroy says:
I don’t actually have all the details about it on hand because it’s full of suck I’m sure.
Deewun says:
I am sooooooooo happy to see this match
This is my one, actually
and I think it is pretty awesome
Cewsh says:
Ahahaha, this is the one Deewun submitted.
THIS IS ALL RIGGED
Deewun says:
It is a 3-man tag match, with an enforcer
if you break the rules, he puts you in your team’s penalty box for 2 minutes
Cewsh says:
Oh man, who’s in it?
Deewun says:
and it is STACKED with talent (and shit)
from the infamous WCW Sin 2001
“Penalty Box match: Team Canada (Lance Storm, Mike Awesome and Elix Skipper) (with Major Gunns) v. The Filthy Animals (Konnan, Rey Misterio, Jr. and Billy Kidman) (with Tygress) w/ special enforcer Hacksaw Jim Duggan from WCW Sin 2001”
Cewsh says:
Ahahaha, holy shit.
JIM DUGGAN PRESIDING
Deewun says:
this match is awesome sauce with a side of Fuckin’ A
Viceroy says:
You thought Inception was shit.
I don’t trust this match.
Deewun says:
Hahaha
Viceroy says:
Especially with so many Canadians.
Deewun says:
It’s true, I am not an Inception fan
Cewsh says:
I will kill you in the face.
And Jim Duggan will allow it.
Deewun says:
send all hate mail to : deewunihao@gmail.com
or comment how shitty I am at : deewunihao.blogspot.com
Viceroy says:
Such shameless plugging!
    The sixth match drawn is…

Amazing Kong vs Sara Del Rey – ROH Supercard of Honor V

Submitted by Ms. Cewsh!

Viceroy says:
In what may be proof that this actually could be rigged.. we have a match featuring women!
And not a bra and panties match either.
AMAZING KONG vs. Sara Del Ray from ROH.
Cewsh says:
OH SHIT
A GOOD MATCH
THANK FUCKING FUCK
Deewun says:
Hahahaha, this thing IS rigged, that’s Ms. Cewshticles’ nomination
Viceroy says:
Hey now.
Cewsh says:
Ahahaha, it genuinely isn’t rigged but that is amusing.
Viceroy says:
That’s misogyny.
Cewsh says:
Your face is misogyny.
Deewun says:
Of course this isn’t rigged
*WINK WINK*
Cewsh says:
Dude, if this was rigged we would not be fucking reviewing WARRIOR/HOGAN II.
Deewun says:
very true
I cannot wait
Viceroy says:
I do hate you all, so anything is possible.
Deewun says:
This is a very Non-WWE card
wonder if that’ll change
Cewsh says:
That’s a really good point.
Deewun says:
This is a very Non-WWE card
wonder if that’ll change
Cewsh says:
That’s a really good point.
Deewun says:
It’ll be really interesting to actually be able to see if we can tell a difference in “styles” as lots of folks like to say
If we can really see a “WWE-style” versus the Puro Deathmatch, the TNA crazies, and the WCW even craziers
Viceroy says:
Well there will at least be AJ and non-AJ.   The seventh match drawn is…

Kenta Kobashi v. Tamon Honda – NOAH 4/13/2003

Submitted by DDT!

Viceroy says:
Alrighty..
We have a man that is built like a car vs. an actual car.
Kenta Kobashi vs. Tamon Honda
Cewsh says:
DDT!
Deewun says:
Oh, good stuff, I really wanted to see that one as well
Cewsh says:
Ahahahaha, he did get his in after all.
Deewun says:
I am in no way a Puro-expert, but this match has me incredibly intrigued by the way DDT described it
Cewsh says:
Totally agree.
We’ve actually only ever reviewed one Kobashi match.
That’s a goddamn crime.
Deewun says:
you have DDT’s description we can share?
Cewsh says:
Yep, hold on.
Viceroy says:
I say let it be a surprise.
Cewsh says:
Oh?
Deewun says:
I’m cool either way
I do have his description right here if we want to share it
Cewsh says:
I have it too.
Viceroy says:
I have no idea what goes on in the match.
I’d rather be surprised.
Cewsh says:
Good point.
Let’s keep it under our hat for now.
Deewun says:
kk, no complaints here

    The eighth match drawn is…

Cena vs. HBK vs. Edge vs. Orton – Backlash 2007

Submitted by Sweet_Chin_Music!

Vice says:
I KNEW YOU WERE A HATER
Ok, moving on..
Cewsh says:
I just crush alot.
Deewun says:
3 left
Viceroy says:
We’ve got some DOBBLE DOBBLE E
Cewsh says:
:O
Viceroy says:
Cena vs. Orton vs. Edge vs. HBK from Backlash 2007.
Cewsh says:
YU…wait, is that good?
Deewun says:
Huh, from the era I wasn’t watching
Cewsh says:
I honestly dont remember that match at all.
Viceroy says:
It has Cena in it.
Deewun says:
I’m not too thrilled, as it has three people I can’t stand and one I’m not hot on
Certainly hoping for a surprisingly awesome match
Cewsh says:
In fairness I think that was still during the white hot Edge/Cena program.
Deewun says:
I’ll have to make sure I include the hype package
Cewsh says:
Damn good idea.
Deewun says:
I’ll go on record, stating I’ll be including any segments or hype packages that are relevant as spacers
because I love your gifs and comments on them, fellas
I think I speak for everyone on that
Cewsh says:
Well we are truly amazing.
Deewun says:
need more Vice
Viceroy says:
I do a lot of work.    The ninth match drawn is…


Owen Hart v. Mankind – No DQ on Raw sometime

Submitted by MichaelC!

Viceroy says:
I do a lot of work.
NUUUUMBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 9
Owen Hart vs. Mankind from RAW.
Deewun says:
Ooooo, Michael C is going to be very happy
Cewsh says:
Jesus christ, some serious variety here.
I’ll tell you straight up, that i’ve only seen about 10 Owen Hart matches.
So this should be interesting.
Deewun says:
Agreed
Mankind bumping around like a fiend should be endlessly entertaining
Viceroy says:
Huzzah I suppose.
Deewun says:
Jeez, looking at these nominations, there are 4 left I really want to see (and 4 I don’t)
this is intense   The tenth match drawn is…

Doug Williams v. Paul Burchill v. the Zebra Kid

Submitted by Mikey_Jones!

Viceroy says:
Then I hate to let you down by saying that match number 10 is..
DOUG WILLIAMS vs. PAUL BURCHILL vs…
the Zebra Kid.
Deewun says:
HOT DAMN
hahahaha
jesus, this is a nutty card
Cewsh says:
Ahahahaha
Viceroy says:
I’m going on strike.
Cewsh says:
In fairness, that match looks random but Mikey_Jones submitted it because its the first wrestling match he ever saw
Which is pretty cool.
Deewun says:
Agreed, some cool history
and really fucking hard to find
I still only have the youtube links
Cewsh says:
I can’t BELIEVE you tracked that shit down.
Deewun says:
that’s my job
I was actually able to trackdown every nomination
Cewsh says:
Dizamn.
But don’t strike, Vice.
Viceroy says:
Haha.
Cewsh says:
I’ll buy you a pizza.
Deewun says:
Why would he strike?
and I want a pizza!
Viceroy says:
Because I’m evil.
Cewsh says:
PIZZA PARTY WOOO
Viceroy says:
I also need to go buy cat food in a minute or two.
My cat is meowing at me.

    ————————————————

The Cewsh Reviews/I Have An Opinion Crossover Super Mega Ultra Technicolor Dream Card 2: Electric Boogaloo Official Card!

1. Michael C: Owen Hart v. Mankind.
2. takerson: Akebono vs. The Big Show.
3. General Wrestling: AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe.
4. Mikey_Jones: Doug Williams v. Paul Burchill v. the Zebra Kid.
5. Ringo: Tsuyoshi Kikuchi v. Ken Ohka.
6. Mrs. Cewsh: Amazing Kong vs Sara Del Rey.
7. The Powers That Be: Penalty Box match.
8. Sweet_Chin_Music: Cena vs. HBK vs. Edge vs. Orton.
9. DDT: Kenta Kobashi v. Tamon Honda.
Main Event. Matt Seaton: Hogan v. Warrior.

This card has, by far, more variety than last time, and I can honestly say that I have only previously seen two of these matches before, so good job boys and girls.

Like Deewun said, if yours didn’t make it this time, don’t worry. There will be a third one of these and you’ll have your chance there just like everyone else. I’m also toying with the idea of leaving one spot in each reserved for the year’s Cewsh Reviews Superfan as we did with takerson this time. More on that later, but sucking up to us wouldn’t hurt.  In the meantime, keep an eye out for our Wrestlemania Preview this weekend, check out that Rajah mainpage, and be good to one another on the week of weeks!

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