Monthly Archives: November 2010

TNA Turning Point 2010

Total Nonstop Action Proudly Presents…


TNA Turning Point 2010

Welcome, cats and kittens, to yet another installment of the late, great review that makes you wait, Cewsh Reviews! We have a special treat for you tonight as we heard down to Orlando Florida for a little shindig called TNA Turning Point 2010! Well Immortal has taken over, and the TNA landscape is pretty hopeless for any of the good guys now. Jeff Hardy, Abyss, Hulk Hogan, Eric Bischoff, Jeff Jarrett and Fortune have joined forces into a supergroup of unheard of scale and they have wrested control of TNA from the hands of Dixie Carter. With the sky dark and the prospects looking grim, can any blow be successfully struck against Immortal? Or will they continue to run rampant over TNA, and make it their own for good. And how the hell is Jeff Hardy supposed to be a bad guy anyway? Only one way to find out.

So without any further ado, let’s do a motherfucking review!

Segment 1 – OPENING VIDEO FEVER!

Cewsh: This video is 100% about Jeff Hardy. He proclaims himself the antichrist of professional wrestling and decrees that our acceptance is meaningless amongst various images of him hurting people and vaguely religious iconography. It should be utterly beyond ridiculous and impossible to take seriously…but it isn’t. Something about this character and the way Jeff is playing it is clicking in a very, very real way. Maybe it’s the way that he seems almost like a perverted mirror image of the character he’s always played, and maybe its just the shock of Jeff Hardy acting heelishly, but what should be silly is dead serious, and would should be dismissed isn’t. This is actually working. And well too.

Vice: I’m a pretty big fan of video games, and I enjoy watching the best of the best play. So while waiting for Turning Point, I was watching the MLG tournaments that were going on at Dallas. While my main interests were Halo 3 national championships and the Halo Reach exhibition, I certainly wasn’t going to turn away from watching crazy Asians and nerdy white folk battle it out playing Starcraft 2. Now, let me paint you a picture here.. it’s the final tournament of the year. They’re in the finals of the tournament, and by god is it an epic series between two titans. The potential final game starts and, within seconds, comes to a screeching halt as the Battle.net servers go down.

Since there’s no LAN option, they rely on this server. Boy did this suck the wind out of everyone involved. The competitors, the commentators, the fans in attendance, everyone watching at home.. everyone just groaned and palmed their faces at this bullshit that has reared its ugly face. 20 minutes go by and they’re ready to start things up again. Servers look good, competitors are all hyped up again, commentators are getting their energy back, all the fans are salivating. Game begins. 45 seconds later, the game again comes to a screeching halt. By the time they got everything up and running, which was well over an hour later, not a fucking person seemed to really give a shit. The guy who was leading the series thoroughly stomped the other guy into oblivion, and that was that. The biggest night of Starcraft 2 in the states became a complete disaster.

So, why am I mentioning all this? Because TNA usually takes the title when it comes to deflating crowds and things turning to shit when it matters. With ease. However, there’s some seriously stiff competition this time around, so I’m really curious to see who will actually walk away with the titles of shame.


Segment 2 – TNA X Division Championship – Jay(‘s Matches May Prove) Lethal (To Me) © vs. Robbie E(ckos).

Cewsh: DAMN YOU NEW JERSEY! THIS IS AN ENTIRELY NEW JERSEY MATCH, WHO DO I ROOT AGAINST NOW?!

Ahem.

A few weeks ago a new force entered TNA and threatens to take it over by force. No, I don’t mean Immortal, I’m referring to the entity known as “The Shore”. Cookie and Robbie E arrived and immediately involved themselves in the business of X Division champion Jay Lethal, leading to a Jersey Shore Street Fight which Robbie won, earning him this title match. I really don’t know what to make of him yet, or how long lived this gimmick can really be, but this is his chance to prove a lot of skeptics wrong.

The interesting thing about this match is that its being contested by two people who wouldn’t seem to be the ideal representation of what the X Division title has been made out to be. Robbie is a bump and feed heel who plays to the crowd and doesn’t fly in the slightest. And Lethal has slowed his offence down considerably since his feud with Flair. So the fact that these guys are fighting for the X Division title is kind of curious when the Television title (which is never defended on Television) would probably make a better fit.

They get on with things and the name of the game is Robbie E being a huuuuuuuge douchebag. He cheats, he mocks, he preens, he may have even pranced once or twice, and no matter how many times Lethal knocks him down, he and his gelled hair rise again to do more preening, until Lethal makes the mistake of underestimating him and falls victim to a Rude Awakening neckbreaker giving us a brand new X Division champion.


JERSEEEEEEEEY!

As a match this was fine. Lethal gave a good annoyed champion and Robbie E had intolerable douche down to an art form, but there wasn’t too much here. It was a moderately paced, decently wrestled match to start the show. But then, after the burn out show stealing opener last month, maybe that’s just what the doctor ordered.

70 out of 100.

Vice: As much as I really disliked Robbie E when he showed up (and no, not because “he was doing a good job as a heel”), man, I find him infectious right now. I don’t think he’s a fantastic talent at the moment, but he’s finally clicking as a performer for me. I love the music, the mannerisms, and how much of a complete douchebag he is, and he’s actually pretty capable in the ring. Normally I’d be kind of miffed that this dude came in and TNA basically just handed him the title, but let’s face it– what the hell did Jay Lethal bring to the table with the X title? The dude has had plenty of great moments, but whenever he’s in the position to succeed, something just goes wrong. Either he gets pushed to the side, or he can’t keep up with what’s given to him, and everything just stands still which results in boredom.

While certainly far from a great opener which TNA generally hits us with every month, this was definitely a good, solid match to kick the show off. And with all the magnificent title wins over the years, and numerous emotional, awesome reactions.. this was something else. Robbie’s reaction to winning the title was fucking priceless and just that alone would say he’s a better person to have the belt around his waist. I love this guy.

Taz’s fist pumping was also hilarious, though for all the wrong reasons.


You Will Never See A Happier Invisible Elephant.

Robbie E Over Jay Lethal Following A Fist Pump Neckbreaker.

Segment 3 – Chicks, Man.

Cewsh: Backstage Mickie (wearing more denim than a late 90s Scott Hall) cuts a promo talking about how she is going to beat up Tara and make her regret getting in her (Mickie’s) business. This is all well and good and would be totally unworthy of note if it weren’t for the fact that I had to watch it 3 times because I kept getting distracted by he hair actually extending up off the screen it has been Bump Itted so hardcore. Then the camera zooms out to reveal that she is wearing chaps. Not like Shawn Michaels’ chaps, but actual denim chaps that merge with Uggs into some kind of superhuman tackiness of the highest order.


Hey, Don’t Look At Me Like That. Blame Your Stylist.

Mickie James’ continuing quest to cause a rip in the time space continuum with her clothing continues.

Segment 4 – Tara(ble) vs. Mickie (Worse) James.

Cewsh: The story behind this whole deal is that Mickie has come in TNA with tons of hoopla and Tara isn’t exactly happy about it, alledging that Mickie is the one who got her (Tara) fired from WWE. She didn’t, but it has touched off a series of brawls between the sides of Tara, Madison Rayne and Sarita against the Beautiful People and Mickie. These brawls have been exceptionally entertaining and have frankly been invigorating the Knockouts division, and this is the first real match to come of it.

The fact of the matter is that these two women are exactly what you remember them to be. Tara is solid and oversexes herself as she gets older and Mickie is botch prone but beloved by the crowd. As such the match swings between botch prone and solid without ever really settling on one of the other before the end comes. Well, the end of the match at least. After the match the two launch into a fantastic brawl all over ringside and into the back which is miles and miles better than their actual match was, leading me to believe that all Knockouts matches should be Falls Count Anywhere if this is the kind of quality they’re providing. So yes, absolutely find and watch this brawl because it carried this high match rating all by itself, but don’t bother with anything that happened in between the ropes. It’ll save you ten minutes.

76 out of 100.

Vice: There were definitely two parts to this. The first part, obviously, was the match. And it wasn’t good. Mickie looks to be getting into much better shape, which is good. I still think that even at her worst, she still looked good, but it’s good that she’s improving her cardio and conditioning. It shows she’s motivated to get back on top instead of just coasting since she’s in the distant #2 promotion. And Tara is just Tara, so the match wasn’t ever going to be incredible.

However, the second part of all this was the post-match stuff after the ref threw the match out. These two brawled like I’ve never seen them brawl, and holy fuck was it legitimately.. awesome. They really stepped it up and beat the crap out of each other, showed a ton of emotion and character, and the fans were going NUTS during all of this, and when they were being restrained. How often do fans get THAT into women’s wrestling? Seriously, it was great stuff and gives me a bit of hope for the Knockouts division.

Nobody Over Nobody Following Shenanigans.

Segment 5 – The Last Team 3D Promo. Holy Shit.

Cewsh: In an interview that was surprisingly more triumphant than it was sad, Team 3D talks backstage to Christy Hemme about how this is their last match and they want to do their legacy proud by beating the Guns and winning those tag teams titles just one last time.


And IIIIIIIII Will Always Love Yoooooooou.

This shit is emotional, prideful and has me incredibly confused. Are Team 3D seriously, seriously retiring like for serious? Because if they actually go through with this then it will be a sad moment in wrestling to see them go and so far they are absolutely doing this the right way. But if this is fuckery…


Segment 6 – TNA World Tag Team Championships – The Motor City Machine Guns (Don’t Kill People, Snake Pliskin Kills People) © vs. Team 3D(ecades of Awesome).

Cewsh: The story behind this started at Bound For Glory when Team 3D came out and announced that they were retiring and before they go all they want is one more match against the Motor City Machine Guns for the tag team titles so they can go out with the belts they helped make famous. The Guns, for their part, were wary but honored and agreed to the match, so now here we are. Win or lose Team 3D is done, and the Guns want to go down in history as the men who retired Team 3D once and for all. But, you know, respectfully.

The match starts off and there is immediately an atmosphere of a big fight in the arena. The fans are going nuts for both teams and they get right into it with the Guns plying their superior wrestling skills and speed against Team 3D’s power and experience. The teams (Shelley and Devon especially) go through a series of equally matched sequences with neither able to truly gain the upper hand, so each time starts pushing themselves for more. The Guns drop tag team move after tag team move on Team 3D while the monoliths respond back with the rough handed power moves and durability that made them the legends they are. As the match goes on things get more and more hectic, including a solid minute of Shelley and Brother Ray trading kicks for chops in the most vicious way possible and Chris Sabin running up the side of a table, backflipping and landing on his feet. Team 3D kicks out of the Skull and Bones and The Gun kick out of the fucking 3D and at this point it becomes clear that not only are Team 3D leaving, they’re putting the Guns over the hardest they possibly can on the way out. One more Skull and Bones and it becomes crystal clear, because the Motor City Machine Guns have pinned and retired Team 3D. No 25th title victory. The clock stops at 24.

This match was as satisfying as it was unexpected. Team 3D came in here to put on their last great performance and to make the Motor City Machine Guns into the top tag team in professional wrestling and they definitively did both. Kicking out of the 3D? Unprecedented. Pinning Team 3D? Hardly less so in recent years. Retiring what might be the greatest (or at least most prolific) tag team of all time? Unbelievable.

Team 3D did more than just lose here. They left a legacy. And if they stay gone this will go down in history as one of the most giving and generous retirements in wrestling history. I know we’ve been down on them many times before but…well…thanks guys. You deserve all the words of praise you’ll get in endless Hall of Fame ceremonies to come.

86 out of 100.
 
Cewsh’s Download Seal of Approval.

Vice: HOLY TAG TEAM AWESOMENESS, Batman. Man this match was fucking good. Team 3D is always good. They may not be the most exciting or, well, the best tag team around, but when they need to put on a good match, they put one on so effortlessly that it’s almost baffling. It also helps that they were in the ring with the Motor City Machine Guns, who are hands down one of the greatest tag teams in the entire world right now. And fuck, if they keep it up like they’re doing for a few more years, I’d consider putting them up in the elite tier of teams. This is one of those teams where I’m so invested, that I’ll honestly be upset if they’re broken up. And I LOVE Shelley on his own.

This was just so perfect for what it was. You got the impression that the Guns sat down for hours and hours and hours studying every tag team match 3D has ever had, and that 3D put every ounce of their beings into preparing for the Guns. The result was just a fantastic, fantastic match. And 3D seriously put the Guns over more than they had any right to. It’s one thing to allow yourself to lose when it counts, but it’s another thing to allow yourself to lose AND make the other team look like they truly are the best team in the world today. And it’s yet another thing to let Chris Sabin kick out of the Dudley Death Drop. Yeah, you heard that right. For what’s got to be the first time in history, Sabin actually kicked out of it. And this wasn’t a delayed sort of thing because the ref was knocked out or 3D were too tired to make the pinfall right away. Nah uh. They hit the 3D, immediately went for the cover, and Sabin kicked out. This was HUGE.

Everything about this match was great. I dare any other match on this show to come anywhere near it. And thank you, TNA, for showing that tag team wrestling is not dead and it can be absolutely amazing when it’s treated with respect.

If you’re a fan of tag wrestling, this is a must see.

The Guns Over Team 3D Following The Skull And Bones.

Segment 7 – Tommy Dreamer Takes All The Credit.

Cewsh: After the awesome showing from Team 3D and their emotional send off we go backstage with Tommy Dreamer who effectively makes the entire thing all about him, by saying that he broke them into the business and is responsible for them being here. Ooookay. Then he complains about RVD totally ruining the vibe with EV 2.0 by suspecting them all of doublecrossing him, so now he has to knock some sense into the guy. I’m calling right now that Tommy Dreamer is the betrayer and will turn heel because why the hell not? Everybody turns heel in TNA so its really about Tommy’s turn.

Segment 8 – Tommy (Please Retire Next) Dreamer vs. Rob Van Dam(mit Are You Turning Heel Or What?).

Cewsh: In recent weeks, since Jeff Hardy turned heel and turned on him most of all, Rob Van Dam has been increasingly paranoid about his other friends and whether or not they have turned on him too, and has become obsessed with the idea that one of the members of EV 2.0 is aligned against him, blaming all of them with Raven most of all, because sometimes wrestlers actually do remember the past. Ev 2.0 has been hurt by his accusations, and now that RVD has started to get violent it is Tommy Dreamer that has confronted RVD and challenged him to a match to slow him down and try to make him see reason.

As a result of the story being told, RVD spends this entire match kicking the everloving shit out of Tommy Dreamer. He hits him with every move in his arsenal, decimates him, and when Tommy’s wrist tries to escape through the side of his hand RVD hesitates for about 8 seconds before going to town on that too. Then, after hitting a Five Star Frog Splash, he picks Tommy up, dusts him off and shakes his (non grotesquely deformed) hand. With that, all appears to be well in the EV 2.0 family for now and HOLY SHIT TOMMY DREAMER JUST WORKED A MATCH WITH A HAND THAT FUCKED UP HOLY SHIT.


GAH!

This wasn’t a great match. It was mostly Tommy getting his ass kicked, and after his injury it was mostly Tommy getting his ass kicked while protecting his hand and grimacing in very real pain. You’ve gotta respect the man for toughing it out, but fuck man, who could enjoy watching something like that?

70 out of 100.

Vice: I wasn’t expecting a ton out of this, and it really didn’t deliver. It wasn’t painfully bad or anything, but it was just.. there. Though, the match gets a bit more emotional and interesting about halfway through. Tommy Dreamer does a frog splash off the top rope, and since fat people should not fly, he comes down awkwardly on his wrist. Immediately you see him clutching a bit, but it just seems like a little bit of selling (which is always a nice touch). But then not long after, the match comes to a stop as Dreamer rips his glove off and you can see a BONE bulging out of his wrist. It wasn’t a pretty sight at all. In a typical sort of spot where it’s obvious someone is injured and the match needs to stop, RVD just jumps on Dreamer and goes for the pin. When Dreamer kicks out, RVD gives him this very confused look, as Dreamer wants to finish the match, broken wrist and all. This is one of those things that keeps me from actually disliking Dreamer. As bad as he can be, and as badly as I just want him to shut up sometimes, there is absolutely no denying the man’s heart and passion. I’ve got the feeling that he’s going to wrestle until he literally dies in the ring. If he’s in his death bed, he’s going to make a match out of it and put someone over.

There was also another megadriver:


BOING.

Not as epic as THE piledriver Dreamer hit him with in ECW (yeah, THAT one), but this one is still pretty good.

And is it just me, or does RVD not seem to age at all? I’m not going to go back and check, but I swear he looked exactly the same a decade ago.

Rob Van Dam Over Tommy Dreamer Following A Five Star Frog Splash.

Segment 9 – Winner Fires One Of The Losers – Fortune (AJ Styles, Kazarian, Doug Williams and Beer Money) vs. EV 2.0 (Rhino, Stevie Richards, Raven, Sabu, Brian Kendrick).

Cewsh: Stables collide!

These two stables having been trying to get rid of each other ever since the night after Hard Justice, due to Fortune’s bitterness that those guys got their own PPV and dare to be in the same company as Fortune. EV 2.0 have pretty much been on the receiving end of endless ass kickings thus far, and they had better be on their game tonight, because if they lose then whichever member of EV 2.0 gets pinned will be fired from TNA immediately. I vote for Rhino.

This fine match which both…er, wait. Actually it involves one side (Fortune) being quite good at what they do and providing good wrestling, and the other side (guess who) doing everything they possibly can to sabotage this match by being in it. Sabu botches, Rhino Rhinos, Richards is dull, Sabu botches some more, Raven oozes around, and Kendrick overcompensates trying to pick up the slack. So what you wind up with is not so much a match as it a study in the “they could carry a broomstick to a good match” myth. Here are some people with the skills and charisma (now at least) of broomsticks, and they could not be carried to a good match.

At the end of the match it is Sabu who loses for his team, so Ric Flair comes out to mock him, insult his uncle, The Sheik, and then sing an off key little ditty that goes like this:

“Goooooooodbye Sabuuuuuuu.

Bye Bye Saaaaaaaaaaaaabu.

Goodbye Saaaaaaabuuuuuu.

…and good riddance to yooou!

WOOOOO!”

And with that, and many hugs and consolation, we see the last of Sabu, as he walks back to the back and manages, miraculously, to not botch anything on the way.


Rhino Sad.

61 out of 100.

Vice: I love the unity of Fortune. They look and act like a team, and I absolutely adore the matching attire.


Sex.

Man though, what if Christopher Daniels was in Fortune instead of Kaz? Seriously, that’d be legendary. Still, I really adore Fortune. They are great.

The only problem with Fortune I have is that they’re still stuck beating down EV2 constantly. While it makes for a decent story, the match quality is pretty shitty. So, you guessed it– this match was not very good. Blah. At the very least, they got rid of Sabu. I guess that’s a small consolation prize. Oh, and the song that Flair sung for him. Basically, Flair killed it on the mic after the match.

But really, this shit just needs to end. EV2 has stayed long enough. Actually that’s a lie, as they’ve stayed far, far too long. And let AJ Styles wrestle in singles matches on PPV ffs.

Fortune Over Ev 2.0 Following Dominance.

Segment 10 – The Pope And Pooh Bear And Chicks Man Continued.

Cewsh: D’Angelo Dinero is backstage and starts to conduct an interview about how all his boys from the neighborhood, including someone identified only as “Pooh Bear”, and his brother are going to be the lumberjacks in his match with Abyss.


Um, Have Any Of You Guys Seen Piglet?

But he hardly gets into it before Tara and Mickie come busting onto the stage still fighting. Dinero has a ball with this rooting them on and cracking a hugely endearing smile like he’s genuinely tickled to have this happen so spontaneously, and wanders off. Then Madison comes in and blindsides Mickie putting an end to the fight and everybody makes a break for it. Awesome.

Segment 11 – Lumberjack Match – Abyss(mall Now And Forever) vs. D’Angelo (Pooh Bear’s Friend) Dinero.

Cewsh: The backstory to this match is as follows: blah blah blah Abyss blah blah blah nail bat blah blah blah Dinero tries his best blah blah blah zzzzzZZzzzZzzzZZzzzZzzz.

67 out of 100.

Vice: Honestly, it’s absolutely shocking how over Pope can be when up against Abyss in a dumb feud wrestling dumb matches. Pope tries super hard to have a decent match, but I don’t think even Michaels, Rock or Austin could even have an entertaining match with Abyss at this point. So, fuck this.

The only thing that was redeeming here, and boy was it redeeming, was Bischoff buying out the congregation and getting them to turn on Pope. Holy shit that is just an epic, amazing dick thing to do. I actually laughed out loud when he did his little money gesture, and smiled ear to ear when Pope was getting his ass kicked. It was great. Absolutely great. Bischoff is such a great heel, and I’m really enjoying the whole Immortal thing, though Abyss brings it down a lot. Imagine if he wasn’t in it– how much better would TNA be?

Cewsh: Inexpressibly.

The ending, where Dinero’s trusting friends and his brother suddenly attack him as Eric Bischoff does the single most smarmy thing in the history of smarminess.


We Love You, Uncle Eric.

This was awesome, and sets up all sorts of potential storylines that hopefully no longer feature Abyss in any way shape or form. Dinero deserves better.

Abyss Over Dinero Following A Black Hole Slam.

Segment 12 – Hype For Impact, Because Why Not?

Cewsh: Oh hey, Stevie Richards wants a match with AJ Styles on Impact. Sweet, I guess we can check that dream match off the list.


I Always Wanted To See AJ Fight A Crazy Hobo.

Segment 13 – Jeff (MECHA HEEL) Jarrett vs. Samoa (Is This My Push Finally?) Joe.

Cewsh: The story here, like most on this card, traces back to Bound For Glory where Jeff Jarrett, after having talked Samoa Joe into helping him fight the evil Dinero, Sting and Nash, turned on Joe and left him tot heir mercy, revealing that he was sided with Hogan all along just like Sting had been saying. Sting has disappeared, Nash is gone, and Dinero has his own troubles, so now Samoa Joe is on a one man wrecking machine streak of vengeance, and Jeff Jarrett is the first in his sights.

Now having read that, what kind of match would you expect this to be? Samoa Joe is a maddened wrecking machine, and Jeff Jarrett is probably the 4th or 5th most important member of Immortal, if that. Would you guess that Joe would steamroll Jarrett, make him pay, and then move on to the rest of Immortal? Hmm, interesting. Would you, on the other hand, expect him to have a 15 minute match where he sells continually for Jarrett, gets in a little bit of his offense, and then loses with the “security team’s” interference and Jarrett applying his own finishing move. No? Well I certainly didn’t. See, I understand the value of doing something like this to keep heat on Jarrett and to keep the feud going, but they already killed it and they don’t even understand why.

Samoa Joe is not AJ Styles. He cannot be booked like AJ Styles. Samoa Joe is a destroyer and that’s what he does and how the fans see him. When Samoa Joe is angry, people get fucked the hell up. They don’t chant “Joe’s Gonna Kill You” at his opponents because it sounds nifty, its what the fans expect and what they know him to be in the business of doing. So when you make him look LESSER than someone like Jeff Jarrett in this situation, you have effectively killed Samoa Joe’s usefulness. Now, if Joe murders Jarrett for 5 minutes and THEN that ending happens, then that is perfect, because Joe is Joe, the fans are robbed of what they want to see, and you STILL get your return match. But the fans have already seen Joe very much not beating the shit out of Jeff Jarrett while pissed, so why should they believe he will now? They’ve killed Samoa Joe vs. The Immortals before it ever got started. And when they try anyway and it fails they’ll have no idea why and blame Samoa Joe.


Literal: Samoa Joe Getting Choked Out.
Metaphorical: My Interest Getting Choked Out.

58 out of 100.

Vice: This match had the potential to be great. Joe is fantastic at killing people and Jarrett can be a fantastic heel, so I was looking forward to this. I was especially happy to see Jarrett rocking the short hair again, and I appreciate his dedication to his character. That said, this match just felt very flat.

The entire story and execution of this match was built around the crowd being super hot for Joe, but they weren’t. When the Impact Zone is apathetic during a Joe match, TNA is clearly doing something wrong. There were a lot of spots during this match that were built around that giant ROAR of the crowd, but again, those roars never came. There were a few decent pops here and there, but nothing really of note. Now had the crowd actually been super into it, chances are I’d be thinking more highly of this match. Who knows, though.

The finish was pretty good, but again, it needed the fans absolutely shitting on Jarrett and desperately wanting Joe’s arm not to hit the mat.. but they just didn’t care. At all.

Jeff Jarrett Over Samoa Joe Following A Rear Naked Choke.

Segment 14 – TNA World Heavyweight Championship – Jeff (The Chef) Hardy © vs., Matt (The Bat) Morgan.

Vice: Has Hardy been preparing for this heel run for the past decade or something? It’s absolutely amazing how fucking amazing his new heel character has been, considering how inexperienced he is in such a role, and, well, how absolutely shit he’s been with characters for basically his entire career. His entrance was great, and I loved his look during his introduction. He’s just so fascinating to watch now, which I never thought I’d ever say.

He worked well in the ring, too. It’s much more grounded, obviously, as flips and whatnot get po– wait a tick. Did a good chunk of people actually just boo the Whisper in the Wind? Hell yes they did. Fucking amazing, that. It’s simply phenomenal how much Hardy has switched everything up and how well it’s working. The dude is just brilliant right now.

This was actually a pretty good, solid match. Morgan is a pretty crappy face, but hey, he did well here. The “big” thing about this match was that controversial ref call. I actually didn’t mind this at all though, oddly enough. For years I’ve always wondered why wrestlers wouldn’t smash down on the shoulder of his opponent right before the 3. You know, so if they actually were going to kick out, they wouldn’t be able to. To me it just makes sense to do. However, Morgan does it (!!) and the ref totally fucks up. So, BAM. That is why they do not do it. That simple. I can sleep at night now. But still, it’s just typical TNA booking, requiring there be SOMETHING screwy about everything. ‘Cause you know, a clean finish means that one person is definitely better than the other person, therefore there’s nothing to keep the feud going. Whatever happened to the art of the roll-up? It seems like it’s been forever since I’ve seen one in a big match. It’s a great way of having one person go over clean and leaving enough open for a rematch.

And It Makes For A Great Chance To Take A Nap.

The post-match stuff was just absolutely marvelous in every single imaginable way. It’s one thing for someone like, say, Randy Orton to have a very long, drawn out celebration after a big win. He’s a face, WWE wants to make sure everybody knows he’s the top banana, and thus he holds the title in the air for like 5 minutes. It’s another thing when a heel pulls this shit and has one of the most over-the-top celebrations I’ve seen in a long time. The dude danced around as Fortune and Immortal came out, champagne was flying around from every direction as he was hoisted up on the shoulders of Roode and Williams, people were drinking beers, there was a confetti blizzard (which is generally reserved for the faces), Flair got ICED, everyone was jumping around having a blast, Jeff was singing along to his theme song..

Man, it was just fucking epic. This is how you show that a group of people have complete control of the company. I bet in kayfabe-land this was all paid for with Dixie’s money, too, which is just the icing on the cake. Everything about this celebration was just amazing, and was done perfectly. Overall TNA doesn’t get many things right, but when they get something right, it’s just a work of art. This was good enough to make me forget about a lot of the other crap that happened on the show. Man oh man.

I love Hardy right now, and I think this is the best he’s ever been. He is a wonderful heel and has shit tons of character, proving once again that TNA is opposite land.

Cewsh: What he said.

There is so much to talk about here, and almost none of it relates to the match, which was solid but very forced. The story here is Jeff Hardy. Jeff has been a babyface, barring a few halfhearted false starts, for over a decade now, and he’s one of those guys who it was just inconceivably to think would ever be a heel. The fans loved him to bits no matter what he did, he had a high flying daredevil style, and I’ve said this before, but he may be the most sympathetic seller since the days of the Rock and Roll Express. So could this man, beloved by men, women and children alike, possibly ever get booed? By being brilliant, that’s how.

He changed everything while changing nothing somehow. He dresses the same, but somehow he looks more sinister. His mannerisms are the same, but done slowly they seem filled with malice. He uses the same moves (except for the Swanton, which is smart) but at a much slower, almost grudging pace, and now they receive enormous boos. He has reinvented himself in a way unmatched by anyone since Hulk Hogan turned heel and started the NWO.

The Face Of Brilliance?

And while I doubt this will be as revolutionary, the fact still remains, right now Hardy is amazing. And that victory celebration where the babyface celebration confetti shoots everywhere and they’re all celebrating like they won the world series and palling around and joking with each other? That speaks more volumes about dominance than a million promos stating it. They don’t even HAVE to tell you they’re on top. The motherfuckers are so in control they just went ahead and threw themselves a victory celebration on live television for 5 minutes with no consequences whatsoever.

Immortal is in control, and with Bischoff and Flair as their mouthpieces, Fortune as their workhorses and the newly heeled Jeff Hardy as their centerpiece, they just may be on to something we’ll be talking about for generations to come.

Stay tuned.

76 out of 100.

Jeff Hardy Over Matt Morgan Following A Twist Of Hate.

—————————

Cewsh’s Conclusion:

Cewsh: I didn’t know what to think about this show on paper. None of the matches looked like anything i’d call a draw, and I was banking on Joe/Jarrett to be the match that saved the whole show. Instead what I got was an absolutely awful few matches, one really special match, and heel work by Jeff Hardy that took my breath away. So as usual TNA leaves me feeling exhilarated, deflated, excited, dubious, angry and joyful. They continue to be the opposite of consistent and sometimes boring WWE by being as mercurial as always, and as always I’m going to be back next month, hoping and doubting all over again.

Because really, where’s the fun in stability?

Oh, and WHERE IS BIG ROB TERRY YOU FUCKS?!

Cewsh’s Final Score: 70.5 out of 100.

Vice’s Verdict:

Vice: Overall this wasn’t the strongest of shows, but there were a number of good things scattered about that were either very good/entertaining, or makes me want to tune in to Impact because there’s potential for something great. I wouldn’t quite say “well done, TNA”, but this wasn’t as bad as it really could (maybe SHOULD?) have been.

Vice’s Final Score: 68 out of 100.

Vice’s Awards:












NOW LET’S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!

Well that’ll do it for us this week boys and girls. Join us next week as we delve deep into the seedy underbelly of California an unearth a Muta, a dolphin master, and something totally Super Crazy when we review PWG Kurt Russellmania 2010. In the meantime be sure to keep reading and be good to one another!