You All Surprise Me

Mrs. Cewsh: Welcome home ducklings. Did you miss me? Cewsh treated you alright while I was away? Feed you anything besides junk food? Is that a backyard wrestling ring I see out the kitchen window? What have you been up to?

No matter, we’re all back together now and we’re going to do this Supplement up right. You may recall, we kicked these amuse-bouche off nine months ago with a little post about how you’re all perverts. Fast forward to today, and I can safely say, yes, you’re all still perverts. BUT, you’re also surprising perverts.

The number of sexual, bizarre, misspelled searches have been eclipsed by a boom of actual, thoughtful wrestling-related searches. Not only that, but searches like wrestle feminists have taken Feminism and Pro Wrestling to 124 views in four months, making it our third most popular page in history. It’s really made me proud and inspired me to take a more vocal role in the wrestling community.

And as your reward for that, we’re going to relieve the very first Supplement on this blog, the porniest, weirdest, and most illegal things Cewsh Reviews has been a result for in a search engine, (since May 26, 2010 when Google redid their webmaster tools and wiped all our search results):

string ass 
Thongs are out, boy shorts are in. Ask Cosmo.
tna knockouts naked 
…well I did say I wanted wrestling-related searches
wrestling kittens 

    Zzzzz  |\      _,,,--,,_        
/,`.-'`' ._ \-;;,_
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chyna wrestler naked 
Yes, yes, we’ve all seen it. Move on.
alex shelley nude penis
In a wonderful cycle, this leads back to the first search string blog post featuring alex shelley skullfuck 
sheamus naked
Maddie, I know that’s you. Bad.
cats and kittens with guns
Feline on feline violence. Tragic, really.
money 100 dollar bills
We don’t have them, although I wish we did. 😦
tna angelina love/velvet sky/madison rayne/odb naked
I swear, we’re going to start keeping these. I feel like we’re disappointing people.
sexy madame
Ooh, porny and illegal!
lump of shit
Links to: 1990 Royal Rumble. Seems a bit harsh.
i have a lump on my penis
I’m sorry, I’m not a doctor, even if I play one on the internet.
woop woop
We are not that boring. 😦
schiavone ugly
Harsh! But fair.
ugliest person in the whole world
Poor Takayama. 😦 
john cena cock
That’s a new one. We don’t get a lot of penises, other than Shelley’s.
women in the kitchen jokes
No! Bad! 
preteen girls wrestling
Aaaaand we’re done.

But as you remember from last year’s outing, these are only searches we showed up for on Google. While funny, they, (mostly,) didn’t earn us any views. Oh ho, what’s that? I have a list for the ones that DID earn us views too? Goody!

wrestler introduction i’m just a common man eating cake with both hands
I’ll give you bonus points for creativity. I will give you that.
rena mero sable latex catsuit
No, sorry, our photo host took them down as pornography.
wwe models for supplements
Do supplements really advertise?
wwe championship bra boobs shin
 ♪♫ One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just isn’t the same. ♫♪
wrestling and divas that smoke cigars in w c w
words like hippophant
It lives on!
woman spelt backwards is kitchen explain
Jesus hates us. There, I explained it.
van damme naked gay
tom zenk nude
tna sex videos of odb and shows tits and boobs without clothes bs
That is bs. 
tits and ass pantsed free pics pro wrestling lacey von eric
Tits can’t really be pantsed, but other than that, sure.
shelton benjamin huge cock
shelley craft +feet
Well we still don’t have pictures of her, but at least we’re moving to less skeevy parts of the anatomy.
sable boob wwf popularity
Yes, random reader, her boobs did have much to do with her popularity. 
rusty rhodes in rope bondage
*shudder* Alliterations. *shudder*
randy savage’s wwe title has velcro -revolver 
If the title had a revolver Velcro-d to it, it would be cooler.

porno russian mistress brutal facesting
Facesting is a new one.

hiroshi tanahashi latex
Cewshy, you got some ‘splainin’ to do.

free tna daffney pron
Seriously, Vice will kill you. I don’t understand why you’re not grasping that.

That reminds me, where did Chot go?

bitch maid lilkes deaning naked
…you know I can usually suss out what the hell your one handed typing means but this time?
batista feels over his prey, wwe champion john cena, when he will battle at extreme rules in a last man standing match.
“Batista feels over…John Cena.” Now there’s something for the search engines.
i’ll take em both i’m hardcore”” legendary
wrestling vocab “”stink-face””
We have vocab now? Like for a test?

Okay kittens, that’s it for this week. I hope you’ll enjoy your own perversions, and I really am proud to say there are no more little people and cheese graters or skullfucking. There are, however, a metric fuckton of searches for WCW reviews, which may be more chilling.

Written by Cewsh

I am the owner and operator of Cewsh Reviews. We review pro wrestling shows in a way that is funny and educational. Probably. Usually at least one or the other.

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